Won Year

Well it's been a year, so let me try and summarize.

On the health and well-being category:

First off my dad is cancer-free, last time we checked, so that's good. That's the best thing that's happened.

I successfully trained for and completed a marathon last March. I averaged about 11 minutes/mile, which was a little over my goal of averaging 10 minutes/mile, but considering how hilly the course was, I will take it. After checking that off my list, I quickly decided to never run that far again. As a professional hairstylist, being on my feet all day is part of my job, and since my feet are destined for awfulness even on their own, I decided it wasn't worth risking injury. My ankles and knees took a serious beating throughout the whole ordeal, and for some reason I could not avoid getting blisters to save my life. I had blisters on top of blisters on top of blisters. At any rate, as amazing as it feels to create and accomplish tangible, physical goals, I decided the cons outweighed the pros and to never marathon again.

So I ditched running, and started swimming and weight lifting. A couple times a week in the summer a few friends and I would meet up at Barton Springs for an early swim. There is no better way to wake up, I assure you! I toyed with the idea of training for a triathlon and even trained for a few months, but life got in the way and I had to put it on hold. I'm ready to pick the torch back up though, think I might start with The Rookie Tri.

Since the beginning of the year I've started taking boxing classes at my local YMCA, as well as really focusing on weight training. I feel like I'm in much better shape than I did when I was training for the half-marathon, leading me to believe a diverse workout is key to being toned overall.

Probably the biggest change in my health this past year has been my diet. I've discovered the Paleo Diet, which has changed my life. There are a million blogs and websites out there dedicated to the Paleo Diet, so you can do your own research, but I'll say this much: it has cleared up my rosacea, something I did not know was even possible, as well as melted fat off my body in places I've never been able to lose much, all while maintaining muscle and gaining a sense of clarity in my brain. My allergies were practically nonexistent this year (if you live in Austin, you know what a big statement that is!), I really cannot say enough good things about it. I highly recommend reading into it if you're interested, or go on trial and just eat paleo every other day for a while, that's what I did. It's improbable to think you can change your entire attitude towards eating overnight, so I definitely suggest looking into it before jumping in. It is not a fad diet, it's a philosophy.

I could go on and on about that forever, but I'll save it for later.



On art and design:

I've cut my hours back at Birds to make time for my apprenticeship at Noah Marion Quality Goods. I've actually just recently debuted my new design, The Barber's Pouch.


Naturally, as a hairstylist this seemed like an obvious crossover. It's comfy, snug, stays in place, right on your hip. Holds up to five alligator clips, two shears and a handful of combs. The bottom is a button snap, to keep hair from collecting inside. Made of vegetable tan leather, will age beautifully over time. As a hairstylist, I see this as an investment in your career.

Working for Noah has been challenging and rewarding, it is always fun to learn a new medium. I am learning how to add a third dimension to the way I draw.


Wallet design. (I'm too into zigzags right now)
I was only mildly satisfied with this one, there are a few glitches I'm working out.

I'm excited to learn more in the arena of accessory design. It's a whole new avenue, but it seems like the natural progression for me.

Always more to learn, as always.

As for illustration, I've just completed an illustration for my friend's online magazine, CAP. I believe the article is about Tesla being a rock star.


I've also been working with a local hair product company VERB, which has been a lot of fun. Nothing yet to show in picture form, but they are fun people to work with and I'm excited to watch them grow.


On everything else:

I guess I've just been living. My thoughts are positive and I think my life reflects that. I try to work all the time. I don't want any day to feel wasted, I never want to feel like I didn't do everything I could to make my life awesome. When I take stock of what I have, I feel overwhelmed with gratitude towards the world around me. I feel blessed, really.

I will try to not go a whole year without between this and the next entry. But who knows, life may get in the way again.

Family, pt. II

I've had this feeling brewing inside of me for a while. I couldn't quite put my finger on it. I have not been quite myself since my father's diagnosis, and I knew that, but I wasn't really sure why.

My father is doing well, by the way, he is undergoing chemotherapy and just had his eighth treatment. Aside from all the crappy side effects, he is in great spirits, and my family continues to be of great support to him. My father has always been my pillar of strength, but right now we have to be strong for him. It is a strange thing, to suddenly realize your parents are mortals, and that one day, as much as we don't want to accept it, we will have to experience their departure. I know it's morbid, and not a good way to think in times like these, but in private, sometimes, it's all I can think about. "What the fuck will I do when he's gone?" I am positive that that day is nowhere near today, and that he has many days ahead that are bright and wonderful. He will live to see my children born, to watch them grow up, and to be a grandpa again. I am sure of it. He is kicking cancer's ass.

But I've had this feeling, underneath all these waves and waves of optimism. I could not define this feeling of dread that did not wash over me so much as it brewed deep down inside of me, far below the calm surface waters of my soul. I'd been thinking a lot about my legacy, versus his. My father moved from Alabama to Oklahoma to build his own life, to start his own family and create an empire that has supported us, up until this very day.

Our family then:

This was before my brother came along and ruined everything (just kidding Clint I love you!!!!!).

Our family now:

I can't believe the most recent picture of us all together was two years ago, but anyway...

My dad created a life that put all three of us through college. Something to be admired. This is why I gave Dad my Stole of Appreciation after graduation:



Not to downplay the significant role my mother played during school, as she made my life much, much easier by covering cost of rent, books, supplies, etc.

I guess with all this stewing inside me, I finally had a word to put to this feeling that had been developing for months: disappointment. I've been disappointed in myself and the state of my life, because if, god forbid, something ever does happen to my father or mother, I want to have accomplished so much more than I have before they pass on. I really want nothing more than to make them proud. I graduated college two years ago (TWO YEARS AGO?!?!), and still have not landed a job in my field. Although, I can offset some of this blame to our really crappy economy, which is a very real thing and has affected everyone I know that I went to school with. In fact, I really don't know many people that I graduated with who have landed jobs in their field, and a lot of them still live at home with their parents (ain't no shame in it). But nonetheless, it has affected me in a very real, very personal way. It's made me question my talent, my worth. Some days, it was hard to even get out of bed, wondering, what is the point? The point of a lot of days were to just muddle through to get to the next one, and spend as little money as possible. College taught me a thing or two about survival on a tight budget, and I can always manage, but I am tired of just managing. I am 27 years old and I'm ready to thrive.

So I've done the only thing I know to do, which is to apply, apply, apply. Write cover letters like it's my job and send my resume out to anyone that will listen. The thing is, even though I have a fancy art school degree from a fancy art school, my degree is kind of bullshit (sorry SCAD) because they did not teach us any computer programs. The only reason I know Photoshop as well as I do is because I taught myself. So, I am having to teach myself other programs in high demand, like Illustrator and In Design. I am on the upswing, now, but I was having a little bit of a quarter-life meltdown for a few weeks there. I really do try as hard as I can to stay positive, because I believe attitude is everything, but it is very hard for something like this to not shake a person.

This year has been a rough one, I won't lie. Moving to a new city, my father's diagnosis, plus that bike wreck I still deal with physically (my shoulder has not been the same since), and the job market on the fritz...it hasn't been easy. But I always have my family to support me, they are a great resource to me for sure. My father getting diagnosed was like putting glasses on, it made me that more acutely aware of all the imperfections in my own life. The new city high has long since worn off, and now I'm just trying to figure out how I can start building my own empire.

On moving.

I live six hours away from home, which is of course Norman, Oklahoma. It's just far enough away to be completely different and close enough for my friends to drive down and visit me for the weekend. They always say they wish they could move here. Austin is somewhat of an American paradise, I think, and I think everyone else is realizing that too. Or maybe that New City High hasn't worn off of me yet. The truth is that anyone CAN move here, anyone can move anywhere they want. It's a matter of priorities. I took a pay cut to move here, but the difference is made up with all the things I can do here that I can't do back home: go jump in Barton Springs, kayak Lake Travis, go on weekly bike rides with the social cycling scene. It is true that life is what you make it, and that you can be just as happy in one place as you can be in another, but the environment around you can stimulate you in a direction. And for me, personally, Austin is the best idea I've ever had in my entire adult life.

I've made a lot of decisions when at the time I honestly was not sure if it was the right decision or not, but stubbornness and pride carried me through to the complete execution of my decision. Going to hair school and moving to Georgia for art school both fall in this category. As it turned out, attending barber college was another bright idea, as it has thus far supplied me with a career and enough money to live on, as well as introduced me to some of the most amazing people. The art school decision, however, I have been struggling with. It has been a long, whiney road to come to grips with my post-college life, with my new found and seemingly pointless debt to pay off student loans for schooling that still hasn't landed me a job. But then I realized something the other day, when I was in the middle of being mad at my expensive degree and the fact that I still don't have a job in my field: it's not my pricey schooling's fault I don't have an artistic job, it's mine. I have to be my own boss and create my own title. Become CEO of my own life.

And art school was worth it, in spite of the student loan debt, because it taught me the importance of time management and the basics of art and design, and much like hair school introduced me to some of the most amazingly talented people I've ever come across. It also taught me how to live on practically nothing pretty comfortably.

I have been inspired. I have fully realized that life is what I make it, and if I want to make money on my art then I am going to have to hustle. So that's what I've been doing; busting my ass to make extra money so I can invest more towards a future that ensures I am getting paid to create. Which brings me back around to my original point, that moving to Austin is one of the best ideas I've ever had, because moving here made me realize that I do have enough ambition and talent to do more than just survive. I might even be able to flourish. Without the confidence that moving here has given me, I'm not sure I would be able to make it as an artist. I would have settled into a familiar, comfortable life as a hairstylist in Norman, Oklahoma and continued to paint as a hobby. Not that there is anything at all wrong with that, I do firmly believe you can be just as happy being in one place as the next.

After all, life is what you make it.







sidenote: I do want to kind of delve into all the reasons I love Austin but I already feel really braggy so I'll save it for another day...but just to summarize: 1. best shape of my life 2. awesome people 3. beautiful 4. barton springs/greenbelt/lake travis ok ok I'm done....

sidenote2: this is also my subtle way of trying to get all my friends to move down here, already.

2009, you so fine.

2009 was the best and worst year of my life. I had some of the most amazing and devastating experiences I've ever had. I entered the year bearing a heavy heart after one of my close friends passed away. I dealt with an overbearing workload from the last few months of school, strife from a long distance relationship, and eventual breakup, but I also went on three vacations and graduated with my BFA in Illustration. There were moments of sorrow, moments of pride, and ultimately, a change in my direction. At the end of the day I had to come home, my new-found debt in tow, to try and figure out my next move. 2010 is all about refocusing my attention in the right direction. My new years resolutions:



So, in case you missed it, I'm going to be updating my blog more, and focus more on my artwork. I've been easily distracted what with my life having been somewhat chaotic since I've moved back home, but I've got to move past that, to grow and progress. I promise a better me this year.

And now, a visual recap of 2009.


rip


my last few months at scad


epic costa rica y mi amiga mejor


graduation/havin the best roommate ever


my brief excursion to ATL


making new friends


getting reacquainted with old ones

and of course:

my return to ZEN